By Dr. Jason Carthen
The ability to manage transition and handle rejection are key capacities for your leadership success. During a recent coaching session, the question of whether an individual should confront a colleague or avoid conflict at all costs was posed to me. I carefully responded that you must pick your battles if you want to achieve long-term success. However, if you cannot move past the perceived slight, it must be addressed for the well-being of the entire team. Additionally, if the conflict is principle centered there is a greater likelihood that a discussion needs to take place. If it’s based upon differing viewpoints or a simple lack of agreement, then that is the norm in most leadership contexts.
Individual’s Ability to handle Rejection
My feedback was based upon an individual’s ability to handle the perceived rejection that comes from disagreement or conflict and then transitioning to the next task, goal or situation without leftover resentment and bitterness. You see, rejection can be a sinister thing, because it can bring forth negative thoughts, deep seated beliefs and misconceptions that generally have no foundation of merit!
Seek Clarity
The best way to free yourself from that cyclical mind-trap is to not take the slight as a personal attack, seek further clarity from the individual and then respond accordingly. Keep in mind that your response can be simply rising above the conflict and rejection without intervention or addressing it head on with a specific goal or expected outcome.
Regardless of which path you choose, it’s vitally important that you transition without regrets or resentment which will only make the next interaction even more volatile.
Leave a comment on my Facebook Page and share with us how you were able to overcome personal rejection caused by conflict. You may be surprised by the similarity of stories!